Virginia R.

Psychologist, Attorney, Baker

Husband: AR

Born: March, 1977

Lives in: Kentucky

Children/Fur Babies: Daughter (21 years old), Horses (9), Donkeys (2), Cows (10), Dogs (4), Cats (2)

Fun Fact

Virginia was a professional soccer player and champion kickboxer.

Interview

Can you start out by telling us a little about yourself?

I am one of those people who feels like it is a shame to have to pick one thing to do in life (professionally). I grew up wanting to be a doctor or a veterinarian, but life happened, and I became a PhD Psychologist, then a lawyer, all the while teaching in a few colleges and high schools, also getting my Master’s in Educational Leadership, and then fulfilling my other lifelong dream, which was to own my own farm. A few years after buying the farm, I opened my dedicated gluten free bakery, Eight Horse Bakery, in Lexington, KY. I also own a trucking company under Eight Horse, helping companies with logistics and moving their freight.

How was your pregnancy, birth and postpartum with your daughter?

I had my daughter when I was 20.5 years old, and was blessed with a completely uneventful pregnancy, birth and postpartum, and a healthy child. I wanted more children, but I knew I also wanted that with my forever husband, and unfortunately, I didn’t meet him until I was almost 40!

What issues have you faced in building your family with your forever husband?

We met when I was about halfway through my 39thyear, and married just after I turned 40. We started trying for a baby right away and were lucky enough to get pregnant our first possible month. Unfortunately, we experienced bleeding around week 5 and then muddled through several weeks of specialists and heartache before getting the final diagnosis of having miscarried that child. That loss was extremely difficult – I don’t think anyone expects to lose a pregnancy, and regardless, it is always just shocking when it happens. We tried again a few months later and again got pregnant, but unfortunately lost that baby at 8 weeks. We were encouraged to enter IVF, which we did, and went through 5 cycles/retrievals, one fresh transfer that failed, and two FETs that resulted in chemical pregnancies. We are currently taking an IVF break.

You’ve always had a lot going on in your life, how do you balance career and family?

I think I operate better when I have a lot of irons in the fire. I have always been driven to accomplish whatever goal I had set for that time in my life, and having my daughter only amplified that as I was always trying to create a better life for her. Even so, I did not have the luxury of relentlessly pursuing a high powered corporate career, as I wanted to be very present each day of my daughter’s childhood. As such, I have always embraced entrepreneurship and new professional experiences, no matter where those took me. My daughter and I had a lot of wonderful adventures!

What does the next year look like for you?

I hope it looks like my husband and I finally getting our rainbow, take home bab(ies)! Of course I am always working on growing my businesses, but really, everything pales in comparison to finally achieving take home baby status!

What advice would you like to share with other moms and moms-to-be?

Figure out early what’s best for you and your family and don’t let others dissuade you or make you feel guilty for your choices. Only you know what is appropriate for you and what will ultimately make your life happy and complete. I wish I had stopped worrying so much about what others thought, much earlier in my life. I wasted a lot of years trying to please others. For the prospective mamas and daddies, advocate for yourselves tirelessly in your TTC journey, whatever that looks like for you. Don’t let doctors, friends or family discourage you or run the show. You know your body best, period.

Lastly, please share a random fact, a favorite quote, or something that means a lot to you:

I am a lover of quotes, so here is one of my favorites:

“Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway.”

-John Wayne